Anatomy of a Drop.

There are generally two types of riders: Those that HAVE gone down and those that WILL. Membership in
one type does not preclude joining the membership of the other. We all know this. Most of us have dropped
our rides at one time or another. But have you ever evaluated the entire process as it is going on?

Recently, I had the opportunity to refresh my memory. Suffice it to say that wheel locks work rather well.
Injuries consisted of: 1) A badly bruised butt on the wife (Laraine), 2) a couple of scratches on the right
freeway peg of the Dragon, 3) the embarrassment of performing a stupid stunt in front of several
HUNDRED other riders.

Do you remember your last drop? Do you remember your thoughts during and after the drop? Compare
your experience to mine as you read the thoughts that were cascading through my mind during the
two-second experience.

<Mind reading on>
Engine running well. In first gear.

Good time at the shin-dig.

Laraine ready, sitting position neutral to the bike.

Bikes all around, group heading to the right.

Watch the HD parked on the right.

OK, Here goes the group. Everyone is staying in the close lane.

Road clear, Bob taking off. My turn next.

Bob just about in front, raise the revs.

Bob in front, start releasing the clutch.

Bob just past my front center, time to move.

Lean to the right, bars cranked, more ga…….what the ????

Bike stopped, What was that clunk?

Slipping towards the tank, Laraine trying to sit in my seat, disengage clutch, no throttle, where is the damn
brake?

What did I hit? Did anyone see that? Can I recover? Why is the bike falling to the right?

Should I give it more gas? Stop? Why is Laraine bailing off the bike? Oh, it must be because my left leg
slammed her off. That means I’m jumping off too, how did that happen?

Hold it up! Keep it up! Don’t let it sag, almost there (Flash back to bad sexual experience).

Grab the bars, don’t let the bike fall. Why can’t I lift it up? Oh, gotta get off my knees first. The bike is
down. The engine is running. Do I hear laughing? What was that thump? Where is Laraine? Why am I
walking? What the HECK did I hit?

Gotta get the bike back up. Geez, 200 miles from home and the bike is trashed, gonna walk home. Laraine
is gonna be mad. How do I tell the Grandparents that they have to watch the kids a few days longer while I
walk home? Where the heck is Laraine?

Grab the bars, the bike ain’t going up. Wait, gotta lift. Grab the seat and the bar. Push. Someone is helping
me. The gym is sure working for Laraine, this is easier than it was last time. Don’t let it fall over too far.
Bike is up. Good. Wait, nobody around the ride but me. Guess the gym workouts are going real good for
me, too.

Why is there a crowd behind me? Will the bike get me home? Was that a giggle? I want to hit something.
Oh, shiiiii… Laraine is down. Wait, it wasn’t that bad, how can she be down? Staying out of the way? She’s
hurt. Oh, damn.

Wait, HD next to us, slow take off, leg push, smudge spot on the HD engine, she hit her butt on the engine.
Hey, that’s funny, did anyone get a picture? Wait, she’s down. Don’t let her know about that thought. Ok,
she’s up. Walking funny, but gonna be ok. 

Ok, time to kill what ever started this. Must be in front of the bike. Didn’t hit Bob, nobody in front of me.
Someone messed around with the bike. I’m gonna turn into the HULK and rip someone apart. Must be a
hole. Wonder if the cops would look the other way while I thump whoever caused this? Wonder if they'd
notice a 6 foot 3 inch, 250 pounder thumping on somebody?

What is that on the rotor? Shiny clamp. What the heck? What is that? Who put that on? Cops? I paid those
tickets. Someone put a wheel lock on my bike. I’m gonna find ‘em and rip ‘em apart. That lock looks just
like …oh, oh. 

Did I put it on? No, yes, no, yes, yea, sure did. My lock. Forgot to take it off. Started off with it on. Laraine
is gonna sssmmmmaaaaaaccccckkkkkkk me a good one! Glad she is riding her own bike. Don’t think I
would survive the head slaps all the 200 miles back home.

Wonder if I can dig a whole in the pavement and tunnel back home? Did I hear someone laughing?

<mind reading off>
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